How many of us say to God on Sundays that we love Him? I'm sure all of us do. We sing it, we pray it, we believe it. And you know, those words are not said in vain. Whenever God hears them, He is very happy. He is very touched. Because He loves us so very much. If a person you love says to you that he or she loves you, you would feel elated no matter what. God is very happy when we tell Him that we love Him.

And yet for the next six days of the week, we fail to love Him, both in word and in deed. Our attention, our heart, is on other things, not Him. We deem other things more worthy of our attention, our time, than Him. Can you imagine the pain that God must feel? That after the joy of hearing us tell Him we love Him on Sundays, to see us totally turn away the very next day, the very next moment? Behaving as if we never knew Him, never loved Him? It is painful to have someone ignore you; it is doubly painful to have someone who has told you he or she loves you, ignore you. And God loves us far, far more than we can ever love each other. Can you just imagine how hurt He must feel? God is not some high and mighty Being who cares nothing for our existence, or sits there waiting to judge us. God is a real Person who loves us so much and desperately wants to be part of our lives. And still we turn away.

Jesus experienced it while He was here on Earth; I believe He still experiences it up in heaven. Sad, isn't it? God forgive us unworthy sinners!

"Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing had yet been done." - C.S. Lewis

Of the most important lessons I have learnt in my life, one of them is the importance of being and remaining weak. You may think, but why? Is not the whole point of discipleship becoming strong and powerful for Christ? And this is where many people stumble- they think that they are too weak, not strong enough, to become Christ's disciples. I tell you, the weaker you are, the better. The lower you go, the higher you can go for Christ.

I refer you once again to Paul. You would think that the greatest of apostles would have been strong and powerful in the faith. Yet he said, "...Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief." 1 Tim. 1:15. And again, "Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me." 2 Cor. 12:9. John the Baptist said, "He must increase, but I must decrease." John 3:30. Jesus Himself said, "Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Matt. 5:3.

Why is it so important to be weak? So that Christ can be strong in us. "And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness." 2 Cor. 12:9. You may think, why can't both Jesus and us be strong at the same time? But it cannot be so. Because the moment that we start to think that we are strong, that we can start managing things together with Him, or even worse, without Him, then we have fallen to the old sin called pride. Because in truth and reality, we are never strong. We may think that we are, but it is really an illusion cast by the devil. "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Jer. 17:9. Our hearts are really very weak, very sinful, and very prone to wander. And anything that we can accomplish is really God working through us. "For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure." Phil. 2:13. So if we start thinking we are strong, then we are deceiving ourselves, and really trying to steal credit from God.

And there are more consequences. "Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the Lord." Jer. 17:5. Contrast this verse with Jer. 17:7-8. The moment we start thinking we are strong, we have unknowingly already begun to depart from the Lord. We have already slowly begun to cease depending on Him. The moment we cease to look to God fully for strength, and look even that tiny bit to ourselves for strength, then we have fallen and missed out on God's glory that could have been. It was indeed fitting that the C.S. Lewis quote above was sent to me by a friend and made a great difference, during a time when I was beginning to think that I could go the way on my own. No, we cannot. And even if we could, God never intended it to be that way. He intended for us to be mere weak vessels, so that His power and glory, which is far, far, far beyond what our greatest efforts are made of, can be revealed through us, and accomplish the mighty things that He intends.

To borrow an analogy I read in a book, think of God as a master surgeon. He can only accomplish His mighty works if His instruments, us, have no will of our own and are willing to submit totally to the works of the Master. He certainly would have many problems with instruments which tried to do things on their own.

I have learned how weak I really am, and realised that without God's guidance, as well as help from others, I would so quickly go astray. And indeed, the greatest revelations and experiences of God in my life have come when I was at my weakest. By God's grace I am learning day by day how to put aside my pride and be content to be weak, so that God can be strong. And it is such a joy to be able to release the burden of living to the God who alone is able to direct our paths! I pray that one day all of us can say earnestly with Paul,

"Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong." 2 Cor. 12:10

Have we ever considered how much God loves us? I mean, we all know that God loves us, but have we ever thought about how much?

Have you ever had the feeling of loving someone so much, wanting to be with that person so much, and yet not being able to? Feeling like that person doesn't love you? Pain, anguish, disappointment, sorrow, whatever you choose to describe it as.

Take that feeling, multiply it a thousand times for good measure, and another few billion times for every person on this earth, and that is somewhat what God must feel. Have we ever thought about how much we disappoint him? How day in, day out, we fail to put Him in His rightful place in our lives. How we would chase after foolish pleasures when He is simply waiting there. How we burn his hurt so deeply every time we sin, unwillingly or willingly. Day after day thousands and millions of people curse Him, ignore Him, use His name in vain, turn Him away, just like our forefathers did to Jesus.

And yet amazingly, God has never stopped loving us. Despite the grief and pain we have caused Him, He continues to love us, with a love that is so selfless, so pure. That is agape love, the highest form of love, the self-sacrificial, all-conquering love that all of us struggle to show. A love that cares not about itself, but only about the other person. And the greatest expression of God's love? He sent His Son to die for us, just so that He could be with us. That is what prompted John to write, "Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins." 1 John 4:10.

In the light of such a love, we ought to be ashamed at the way we are living. We need to learn, by God's help, how to love others with that same kind of love that He loves us- selfless, agape. And more importantly, we need to learn how to love Him.

"And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might." Deut 6:5

The Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.